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What exactly is a “dating strategy?” The best example is to point out the one that I know you’re already doing – you have posted a profile a dating website. In order to make the most of this dating strategy, you had to implement other dating strategies too. For example, you had to write a description of yourself, your goals, and where you’re headed in life. It’s important that you did this with a lot of thought and care, because if you just threw something together quickly, then you may not have conveyed what is special and unique about you.
I know that you also described in your profile what you’re looking for in a partner. This dating strategy too requires a great deal of time and thought so that your profile can catch the attention of many prospects. Do I need to ask if you posted 2 or 3 flattering pictures of yourself? This is an essential dating strategy that can maximize the number of responses that you’ll get to your profile.
However, the most important dating strategy, the one that prevails over all others, is this one – to make finding a life partner relationship the #1 priority in your life. For many people, this could mean a lot of reorganizing of how you spend your time. I would be lying if I said that you shouldn’t have to do anything in order to meet your ultimate life partner. But the reality is that in order to meet this person, you have to implement a lot of dating strategies, and do so smartly and frequently. By making the commitment to finding your life partner a priority, you put yourself in the position of screening out a lot of
unsuitable candidates before you end up kissing frogs.
I understand that dating can be a frustrating and depressing experience. So it’s especially important that you implement the dating strategy of keeping a positive attitude. How is this done?
One way is by continuously persisting toward your goal. I tell my coaching clients that “being proactive has an antidepressant effect.” Make sure that you’re doing all that you can to meet men, and doing so with determination. And if one thing doesn’t work, try another. For example, if you’re not getting dates with your current online profile, consider changing it. Try out new and different ways of presenting yourself in order to capture the interest of as many men as possible. Perhaps you could consider shortening your description of the man you’re looking for, so that more men may qualify themselves when viewing your profile.
How are you spending your time when you’re not dating on the computer? Are you joining singles’ clubs, attending activities where single men congregate, in order to meet as many new people as possible? Since you say that you’re a good cook, have you considered throwing a party where you can show off your skill, inviting as many single people that you know, both men and women, and making sure that they bring their friends, and even ex-boyfriends? Maybe you could offer to give a cooking class at a local community college, on easy weekday meals, just for bachelors. How’s THAT for strategizing?! By the way – you HAVE been communicating your goal of finding a life partner to everyone in your life, right? If you haven’t, pick up the phone and call some of your friends and ask them to introduce you to at least one single man that they know. So many people have met their eventual spouses through people-networking like this. But it doesn’t happen unless you communicate to others what they can do to help.
Everything that I mentioned so far will really only work once you’ve made finding a life partner your #1 priority. That commitment will give you the motivation and the energy to “kick it up a notch,” and you will undoubtedly get more dates. If you don’t get more suitable prospects as a result of your intensified efforts, you are welcome to contact me in a few months to review your dating strategies and see what else to add to the mix. You will see, however, that when you FOCUS on your goals and channel your efforts toward them consistently, then you are giving yourself better chances for success.
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